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All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of

easy, painless removal – The epilady, scissors, razors, Nair And

now…the wax.

 

My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner,

play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my

mind for the next few hours: “Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the

medicine cabinet.” So I headed to the site of my demise: the bathroom.

 

It was one of those “cold wax” kits. No melting a clump of hot wax,

you just rub the strips together in your hand, they get warm and you

peel them apart and press them to your leg (or wherever else) and you

pull the hair right off. No muss, no fuss. How hard can it be? I mean,

I’m not a genius, but I am mechanically inclined enough to figure this

out. (YA THINK!?!)

 

So I pull one of the thin strips out. Its two strips facing each other

stuck together. Instead of rubbing them together, my genius kicks in

so I get out the hair dryer and heat it to 1000 degrees. (“Cold wax,”

yeah…right!)

 

I lay the strip across my thigh. Hold the skin around it tight and pull.

It works! OK, so it wasn’t the best feeling, but it wasn’t too bad. I can do

this! Hair removal no longer eludes me! I am She-rah, fighter of all wayward

body hair and maker of smooth skin extraordinaire.

 

With my next wax strip I move north. After checking on the kids, I

Sneak back into the bathroom, for the ultimate hair fighting championship. I drop

my panties and place one foot on the toilet. Using the same procedure, I

apply the one strip across the right side of my bikini line, covering the

right half of my *hoo-hoo* and stretching down to the inside of my butt

cheek (Yes, it was a long strip) I inhale deeply and brace

myself….RRRRIIIPPP!!!!

 

I’m blind!!! Blinded from pain!!!!….OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!! Vision

returning, I notice that I’ve only managed to pull off half the strip.

CRAP!!! Another deep breath and RRIIPP!! ?Everything is swirly and

spotted. I think I may pass out…must stay conscious…Do I hear crashing

drums???

 

Breathe, breathe…OK, back to normal.

 

I want to see my trophy – a wax covered strip, the one that has caused

me so much pain, with my hairy pelt sticking to it. I want to revel in the

glory that is my triumph over body hair. I hold up the strip!

There’s no hair on it. Where is the hair??? WHERE IS THE WAX???

 

Slowly I ease my head down, foot still perched on the toilet. I see

the hair. The hair that should be on the strip. I touch. I am touching wax.

CRAP! I run my fingers over the most sensitive part of my body, which

Is now covered in cold wax and matted hair. Then I make the next BIG

mistake..remember my foot is still propped up on the toilet? I know I need

to do something. So I put my foot down.

 

DANG!!! I hear the slamming of a cell door. *Hoo-Hoo*?? sealed shut!

Butt?? Sealed shut!

 

I penguin walk around the bathroom trying to figure out what to do and

think to myself “Please don’t let me get the urge to poop. My head may pop

off!” What can I do to melt the wax? Hot water!! Hot water melts wax!!! I’ll

run the hottest water I can stand into the bathtub, get in, immerse the

wax-covered bits and the wax should melt and I can gently wipe it off,

right???

 

WRONG!!!!!!!

 

I get in the tub – the water is slightly hotter than that used to

torture prisoners of war or sterilize surgical equipment – I sit. Now, the

only thing worse than having your nether regions glued together is having

them glued together and then glued to the bottom of the tub…in scalding

hot water Which, by the way, doesn’t melt cold wax.

 

So, now I’m stuck to the bottom of the tub as though I had

cement-epoxied myself to the porcelain!!

 

God bless the man who had convinced me a few months ago to have a

phone put in the bathroom! I call my friend, thinking surely she has waxed before

and has some secret of how to get me undone. It’s a very good conversation

starter – “So, my butt and hoo-hoo are glued together to the bottom of the

tub!”

 

There is a slight pause. She doesn’t know any secret tricks for

removal but she does try to hide her laughter from me. She wants to know exactly

where the wax is located, “Are we talking cheeks or hoo-hoo?”

 

She’s laughing out loud by now…I can hear her. I give her the

rundown and she suggests I call the number on the side of the box.

YEAH!!!!! Right!! I should be the joke of someone else’s night.

 

While we go through various solutions. I resort to scraping the wax

off with a razor. Nothing feels better then to have your girlie goodies covered

in hot wax, glued shut, stuck to the tub in super hot water and then

dry-shaving the sticky wax off!!

 

By now the brain is not working, dignity has taken a major hike and

I’m pretty sure I’m going to need Post-Traumatic Stress counseling for this

event.

 

My friend is still talking with me when I finally see my saving

grace….the lotion they give you to remove the excess wax. What do I really

have to lose at this point? I rub some on and OH MYGOD!!! The scream

probably woke the kids and scared the dickens out of my friend.

It’s sooo painful, but I really don’t care. IT WORKS! It works!

 

I get a hearty congratulation from my friend and she hangs up.

 

I successfully remove the remainder of the wax and then notice to my

grief and despair….THE HAIR IS STILL THERE…ALL OF IT!

 

So I recklessly shave it off. Heck, I’m numb by now. Nothing hurts. I

could have amputated my own leg at this point.

 

Next week I’m going to try hair color……

 

Do you yearn for a Christian based fiction book geared for younger elementary children?
If so, then check out the Meghan Rose series. This new series from Standard Publishing introduces Meghan Rose, the bounciest first-grader in the world! Young readers will get to share Meghan’s adventures, laugh, and learn important life lessons. Each title also includes a bonus section with discussion starters and fun activity ideas.
I am excited to welcome author Lori Z. Scott, joining us today to talk about the newest releases in her Meghan Rose series—Meghan Rose All Dressed Up and Meghan Rose Has a Secret.

Since 2000, Lori has published over fifty short stories, devotions, puzzles, poems, and articles for children, teens, and adults. She has been published in Focus on Your Child, MOMSense Magazine, Spirit Led Writer, Pockets, and Devozine. She is the author of Busy Moms’ Devotions to Go and four Meghan Rose titles. In addition, Lori has contributed to over a dozen books including Real Moms, Cup of Comfort Book of Prayers, and 2007 Eppie Award winner Infinite Space, Infinite God.
A graduate of Wheaton College, Lori has worked with children for over twenty years, both as a teacher in the classroom and as a volunteer for local churches, museums, and schools. When she’s not busy driving her two children to various church, sporting, and artistic activities, she moonlights as a speaker for women’s groups and schools.
Lori, welcome. Thanks for taking time to be with us today.

My pleasure.
You often introduce yourself as first a mother, then a teacher, and finally a writer. Why is that?

I feel like being a mother is my highest calling in life. And that means I’m a caregiver, nurse, tutor, cheerleader, counselor, transportation expert, and nutritionist. Doing all those mommy things is a bit like filling a jar jam-packed with marbles. I pursue my own interests in the empty spaces around those marbles because being a mommy trumps all.
I call myself a teacher second because working with kids has been such a huge part of my life. Just as God gifts different people for different tasks, I feel like God has given me a special ability to understand and work with children. Or maybe I’m just not ready to give up playing and comics yet.
I call myself a writer last because I often feel like writing too much fun—and pays too little—to be a real job. But then again, writing is another interest in my life I have felt called to pursue. God blessed me there too. When I decided to start writing, my first submission won second place in a science fiction writing contest. My second submission won MOPS International story writing contest.

I guess what I want moms to realize is, it’s okay to put the mommy part of our lives first and to trust that God will still bless, fulfill, and lead us in other areas as well.

Why would parents like your series?

A good question—one that I have to answer from my own experience. When my daughter was in first grade, her teacher started reading the Junie B. Jones books in class. Since Meghan liked them, I picked up a few copies.
Well, I enjoyed the humor in those books, but had to edit out some of the grammar slips, name calling and attitudes. I thought there had to be an alternative choice—a book that was just as funny, but also had a good take-away value. I scoured the Christian bookstores. I couldn’t find any fiction for that age group, only devotional books and Bible stories.
When I asked about it, bookstore owners often commented that they wished they could offer such a book. In fact, they’d had numerous parents come to the store, all asking the same thing: Do you have a fiction book my young child will enjoy reading? And, like them, I walked away empty handed.
So I wrote the book I couldn’t find—a book for my daughter AND for all those other mothers just like me. I put in everything she wanted—an interesting story filled with giggles and characters worth rooting for—and everything I wanted—good moral values (but with nothing preachy about the story at all). And because I don’t believe I’m alone in those desires, I’m convinced other parents (AND THEIR KIDS!!!) will like the series too.

Why did you include discussion questions and activities at the end of each book?

That’s the teacher part of me flaring up big time! LOL. But seriously, how many times have you as a mother read a book and thought, “There’s a good lesson in here” but didn’t know how to draw your child into a discussion about it? I remember reading Where the Red Fern Grows with my daughter and wanting to talk about the tender topic of death that book touches on. Since I didn’t know where to start, I couldn’t fully take advantage of that teachable moment. (Instead we both just cried all the way through the last few chapters.)
That’s why I included questions for parents or teachers to use after they read the story, so they can capitalize on the book’s underlying message. (Although I hope people laugh through the last few chapters of Meghan Rose instead of cry!)
And the activities are all for the kids. They love extending the story experience by creating their own volcanoes or whatever. I also put a ton of other ideas for parents and kids on my website under the BLAM (Brilliant Little Activities to Make) link (www.MeghanRoseSeries.com).

So each book has an underlying message? Tell us about that.
As I mentioned, I wanted the stories to do more than entertain. I wanted them to have takeaway value. Each book’s message is very subtle but still evident throughout the book. While Meghan Rose on Stage! talks about discovering your talents, it’s ultimately about friendship. Meghan Rose Has Ants in Her Pants explores the idea of patience—a difficult area for most kids to deal with. The newest two books—Meghan Rose All Dressed Up and Meghan Rose Has a Secret—address inner beauty and kind words. But again, none of it is preachy. It’s heavy on the humor and very, VERY light on the lesson…yet neither quality is lost on the child.
Are the books just for girls?
Not at all! One mother of two boys emailed me about how much her sons enjoyed reading them with her. She said they could hardly read for laughing so hard—they were all HOWLING!! The youngest one loved it so much he started sleeping with the first book under his pillow at night.
In fact, the comment I hear most from people who read the books is, “I laughed out loud.” The second comment I hear most often is about how much kids (and parents) like the discussion questions and activities. How can all that just be for girls?
Where do you get the inspiration for the humorous parts of the books?
Most of that comes from my upbringing. My dad was always coming up with puns and jokes. He made them up on the spot, and they were hilarious! I can’t tell you how many hours we spent laughing around the dinner table. I think dad influenced all my sisters. In fact, one of my sisters was part of an improvisational comedy team. (She’s also a pastor’s wife—it’s a fun combination.)
I also grew up on a steady diet of comic books. Peanuts and Garfield were my favorites, and later Calvin and Hobbes. And we’d also watch comedy on television, especially The Carol Brunette Show.
That said, some of my inspiration just comes from everyday life. My kids crack me up. They both have a great sense of humor.
The main character in the Meghan Rose series shares your daughter’s name. Why is that?
She was the foundational basis for the character. When I started the series, I needed someone likable, outrageous, clever, spunky, and sensitive all rolled into one. Well, that’s my Meghan. And since I originally wrote the books just for her, I simply used her name. You’ll also see the names of other people I’ve met, although the character they’re named for is totally fiction. Mrs. Arnold, for example, was the name of Meghan’s real first grade teacher. But she’s not like the Mrs. Arnold in the book.
Are any of the characters like you?
I think maybe there’s a little bit of me in all of them. Certainly a lot of me is reflected in the teacher, Mrs. Arnold. Then Ryan shows the jokester side of me, Kayla has the goofy side, Lynette has the rule-following, show-off side, and Meghan’s Mom has the practical side. The Meghan character herself is about 80 percent of the “real” Meghan, 10 percent of me and my creative musings, and 10 percent total fiction.

Do you ever visit schools to talk about the books?

Yes! I’ve visited several schools and talked about the steps a writer goes through to get from idea to published book. I’ve also shared ways to boost everyday creativity and develop writing ideas. All three presentations seem to fire up everyone, even the reluctant writers. Kids tell me that what they enjoy most about the time we spend together is learning my two-handed drawing trick and discovering how to write their own jokes.

As a teacher, I value school visits. I think it’s important to inspire and encourage all children…to help them see opportunities and possibilities. As a mom, I can’t help seeing my own children reflected in the faces I meet. That gives me extra incentive to make kids want to reach their dreams, whatever they might be.

Can you share one idea for mothers to help their children be more creative?

Sure. Hmmm. Hard to pick one. I guess one great idea is to encourage your children to be involved with artistic endeavors. That can include a whole variety of options, like drawing, painting, or making things out of shoe boxes. Children can listen to or dance to music. Or make their own music. They can dress up and put on a show for family or friends, or memorize a silly poem. And it should be fun, not work.

Where can readers learn more about you and the Meghan Rose books?

They can visit my website at www.MeghanRoseSeries.com. My award-winning illustrator, Stacy Curtis, designed it. It offers jokes, puzzles, and activities for kids and great ideas for teacher and parents (on Mrs. Arnold’s BLAM page). It also introduces the books and characters, provides links to book reviews, and gives ordering information. I posted a retold fairy tale reader’s theater that gives visitors a good feel for the style of humor found in the books at www.meghanroseseries.com/teachers_LittleRed.asp .

You can also purchase a copy Meghan Rose on Stage!, Meghan Rose Has Ants in Her Pants, Meghan Rose All Dressed Up, andMeghan Rose Has a Secret by clicking on the titles here.

That sounds great. Well, thank you for your time!
Thank you for letting me visit with you.

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